


Betrayal

by wishingwithoutwings



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cheating, Destiel Fluff, M/M, Supportive!Sam, spn universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-23 15:17:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14936778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wishingwithoutwings/pseuds/wishingwithoutwings
Summary: Dean and Castiel have just, finally, gotten together. But Dean keeps messing up. Over and over again. Castiel tries so hard, loving Dean all the way through, but can they work through it before one of them gets really hurt?





	1. Chapter 1

She’s incredibly soft, kind-faced, warm-skinned. He drags the blanket back over them, their desperate, coordinated movements having pushed it off again, exposing them to the brisk air flowing from the air conditioner. He can think of nothing else but this moment; he barely hears the door opening until-

“Dean?”

He opens his clenched eyes and meets wide, bright blue ones. Castiel’s mouth works open and closed, then he flees. Dean hears him choke back a sob as he runs down their hallway and up the metal stairs, opening their front door and slamming it closed, all while Dean hovers over the girl, in shock.

He looks down at her, her face still flushed from what they were doing moments before. All at once, he sees how unappealing she looks, her hair a greasy, messy mane of yellow, her eyes dull, almost lifeless. He scrambles away, taking the blanket with him and wrapping it around his sensitive areas.

“I, uh. I don’t, um, please, uh. Please leave,” he manages to get out, staring at her.

Her face twists. “Excuse me?”

He begins to get off the bed. “Leave. Please. Don’t—don’t come back.”

She scoffs. “Fine, douchebag. Who was that, anyway? Your boyfriend?” She laughs at her own joke. Dean doesn’t respond, and looks away.

She stops laughing. “Holy shit, you told me you were single! Double douchebag! Jesus Christ. I’m not a fucking home-wrecker, you dick! God!”

She rolls off the bed and throws her clothes on before stomping out, slamming the door behind her.

Dean sits on his bedside table with his pants half on, and buries his head in his hands.

—

When Sam returns to the bunker, he finds Dean nearly hyperventilating, pacing in front of the maps table.

“Dude, hey, Dean, what happened? What’s wrong?” Sam looks around, then asks, “Where’s Cas?”

This seems to make the hyperventilating worse.

“Hey, hey, hey, okay, um, here,” he says, thrusting a paper bag in Dean’s hands. Dean bats it away, bracing himself on the maps table and screwing his eyes shut. After a couple minutes, with Sam looking on worriedly, he finally calms down enough to burst out,

“Cas, he ran out. I don’t know where, I’ve been out looking for hours, I even went to motels and asked if he had checked in or something, I screwed up big, Sam, fucking hell—”

Sam holds out his hands. “Whoa, okay, what did you do?”

Dean slants his eyes at him. “I may have brought a girl back—”

“What?”

“Yeah, Sam, I know, could you please help me find him? He’s in danger out there, there are angels hunting for him and I just—“ He breaks off, beginning to breathe harshly again.

Sam runs a hand through his hair. “Okay, fine. I’ll go find him. But, Dean—”

Dean glances up at him.

“Fuck you, for Cas’s sake. You’re a fucking idiot.”

Dean nods.

—

Sam’s been driving around for about thirty minutes when Cas answers his prayers.

“ _Sam, I’m at the Blackbird Motel off the nearest exit of the interstate. Room 42._ ”

Sam nearly drives into a ditch, but quickly prays back to him.

“ _Okay, Cas, I’m coming._ ”

—

Castiel is sitting in front of the window looking out when Sam opens the unlocked door to the motel room. It’s a really shitty motel, with sagging wallpaper and a strange smell, but Sam ignores it and pulls up a chair, sitting next to his friend. He sits there, waiting. There’s no rush.

After a couple silent minutes, Castiel speaks, still looking up at the sky through the window.

“I don’t understand why he would do that.”

Sam sighs.

“Look, man, he might have been scared of your guys' new relationship or something. He does love you, Cas.”

Castiel slants his eyes at him. “He’s never said so.”

“Well, he’s an idiot, because you guys are kind of perfect for each other.” When Castiel turns back to the window with a shrug, Sam continues. “He’ll come around, apologize. He was, like, freaking out when I got back. Come on, let’s go back. Face your fears.”

Castiel rolls his eyes. He’s been taking on human mannerisms ever since he lost most of his grace, but it still looks strange to see him do such human things.

“I’m not afraid of Dean, Sam.”

“Taking it literally, again, dude. Come on. Let’s go.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

_Dean doesn’t know when he first realized the nature of his feelings for Castiel. It felt like they had been there forever, waiting for him to discover them._

_He finally realized the moments they’ve had together for what they were, and mentally punched himself once he realized they’d been dancing around this—thing—between them for years, now. How could he have not recognized it from the start?_

_Summoning up the courage to confront Castiel about it took some time, mostly utilized by pacing in his room. Dean replayed all the fond looks and careful watching that he could remember, and kicked himself mentally with every one._

_Walking up to Castiel’s room and knocking on the door was more nerve-wracking than he expected, but Castiel had already opened the door and greeted him before he could decide to turn tail and run. He followed Castiel into his room, Castiel beckoning him to look at some of the recent research he’d done, as well as a couple pictures of animals that he took while he was outside today. The happiness that shone from the ex-angel’s face as he pulled up a particularly good picture of a bee on his phone made Dean burst out,_

_“Do you, um, like me?”_

_Castiel looked at him quizzically._

_“Of course I like you, Dean, you’re my friend.”_

_Dean shook his head. “No, I mean, like, like like me?”_

_Castiel did that head tilt thing that makes Dean’s heart clench. He tried again._

_“Do you…want to be in a romantic relationship with me?” God, he sounded like a teenage girl._

_A slow smile spread across Castiel’s face. He put his phone down._

_“It took you a very long time to realize,” he said._

_Dean rolled his eyes, but he’d also started smiling, too._

_“I guess I’m just ignorant.”_

_Castiel frowned. “Don’t say that about yourself. You’re very intelligent and observant.”_

_Dean rolled his eyes again, and stepped closer. “Shut up, Cas,” he whispered, as he cradled Castiel’s face in his hands._

_—_

Dean jerks from his chair as the bunker door opens, and he stands, looking up at Castiel and Sam as they descend the stairs. Sam quirks his mouth at his brother, seeing him watch Castiel, twisting his hands. Castiel reaches the bottom of the stairs first, and turns towards the entrance to the hallway. 

Dean swallows, then walks towards Castiel. Castiel doesn’t turn, just keeps going across the room. Dean has to walk faster to catch up.

“Cas, I’m, uh, I’m really sorry—“

Castiel interrupts him, barely turning. “Yes, thank you, Dean.”

Dean glances back at Sam. Sam shrugs, holding up his hands. 

“Um, Cas, I wanted to explain myself and—”

Castiel rounds on him right before they reach the hallway. “Do you actually want to tell me why you were sleeping with a random woman? Do you actually _know_ why?”

Dean works his mouth, then tries, “Uh, I don’t know what you—”

Castiel nods. “Dean, I have some research to do. You can try to find an answer to my question while I do so. Thank you for the apology.”

And he enters his room, closing the door in Dean’s face. 

Dean turns around, facing Sam, who’s watching him, tight-lipped. 

“What?” Dean demands.

“Nothing, just,” he says, “you suck. Dude, Cas loves you, you guys have been in a relationship for I don’t even know how long, he probably knows you better than me, even, and you go and pull this. Seriously, man, what’s wrong with you?”

Dean looks away. “I don’t, um, I don’t. I don’t know.” 

“Yeah, Dean, you don’t know. Cas doesn’t deserve that, you know.”

Dean sighs. “He deserves—he deserves everything.”

Sam nods shortly. “You remember that.”

—

_Their first kiss was like fire, finally sparked into flames after waiting to burn for eternity._

_Dean broke away first, gasping for air, panting like he’d just run a marathon. He laughed as Castiel tried to follow him, chasing his lips._

_“Come on, man, gotta breathe,” he said, twining their fingers together. Castiel smiled, glancing down at their joined hands, settling his free hand on Dean’s hip. Dean’s heart fluttered at the sight of the rare, gummy smile._

_“Are you done breathing yet?”_

_Dean chuckled, and pulled him in for another._


	3. Chapter 3

Their next case is one that Castiel finds for them. An outbreak of strange deaths in Minnesota prompts Team Free Will to get on the road, regardless of whatever issues they may be having personally. Sam is slightly uncomfortable—scratch that, incredibly uncomfortable, seeing as Castiel is not talking to Dean and Dean has yet to properly apologize. Sam is worried about his brother and their best friend, since Castiel has had red-rimmed eyes for the past couple days and Dean has been lashing out more often, but he tried and he couldn’t help much. So he resigns himself to an extremely awkward car ride.

The whole ride, Castiel looks out the window, staring at the sky. He doesn’t seem to move at all. Dean, on the other hand, Sam catches him fiddling annoyingly with the music, switching between radio stations and his collection of tapes. Every couple minutes, Dean glances at Castiel through the rear-view mirror. The few times Sam tries to make conversation he’s met with short answers from Dean and no answers from Castiel. Needless to say, he gives up after a couple attempts.

Once at their chosen motel, Castiel checks in for them while the brothers grab their duffels. Sam side-eyes Dean as they come around the car together to the trunk.

“What?” Dean asks defensively.

Sam shakes his head, then goes in to meet Cas. Dean slams the trunk shut. 

“Sorry, Baby,” he mutters.

Inside the motel, Castiel turns to Sam first. 

“You take this room. I will be in Room 13.” He then turns to Dean, and almost leans in, but seems to remember at the last second. He turns away. 

Dean glances at Sam, who points his chin at Castiel’s retreating back, then turns away to their own room. Dean bites his lip, and jogs after Castiel. 

“Cas! Hey, wait up!”

Castiel ignores him, fumbling to fit the key in the lock on his door. He nearly drops the plastic fob, and Dean watches him sadly. Did he really want to get away from Dean so badly?

“Cas, hey, come on, I need to talk to you.”

Castiel shakes his head and pushes inside the room, the door finally opened. He throws his own duffel in the corner and darts into the bathroom, leaving Dean to shut the door. 

Dean rubs a hand through his hair and knocks on the bathroom door. 

“Cas."

He knocks again. 

“Cas,” he says.

“Do you normally interrupt other people while they’re using the facilities, Dean?” Comes the angry reply. 

Dean sighs. “Sorry, I just really want to talk to you. You’ve been ignoring me for days, I just wanted to apologize again—”

The door suddenly opens, and he’s faced with a furious ex-angel.

“Do you know why you did it in the first place?”

Dean looks away. 

“That’s what I thought. Now, if you’ll excuse me—”

Dean catches Castiel’s arm as he turns away. “Cas, we both know you don’t have any research to do, that’s bullshit. Come on, I want to fix this, please.”

Castiel snorts. “If you really wanted this with me, why did you sleep with someone else? Sober? No curses? No apparent excuse?”

Dean opens his mouth, and closes it. “I don’t know, she was just there, flirting with me at a bar, you and Sam had been gone for a week on that hunt since I was sick when you left, and I dunno, it was like I forgot—”

“Forgot? You forgot? And here I was, thinking we were both happy for the two months that you managed to stay faithful, Dean.” He sighs. “We should go meet with Sam now.” He rips his arm from Dean’s grasp and starts towards the door.

Dean looks down. “Cas, I—I love you.”

Castiel stops. 

Now that he’s started, it seems like he can’t stop the outpouring of words. “Cas, I’ve loved you since that first day, when I realized that I even wanted you in the first place. I don’t know how I could have forgotten that, and I’ll go for the rest of my life unable to forgive myself for forgetting for even a second, there’s no possible excuse. I just—I don’t want to ruin this like I’ve ruined everything else in my life, and you know better than anyone that ruining things is what I’m best at, just please, _please_ , I _have_ been happy these last few months, happier than I’ve ever been, please—”

He’s stopped when Castiel kisses him. 

It’s hungry, desperate, but soothing at the same time. Their lips connect again and again, starved of this for weeks, their tongues re-exploring the insides of the other’s mouth, relearning each other’s bodies. It lasts for all of ten seconds, but they’re both breathing hard when they break apart, and Dean’s already half-hard in his pants. 

Castiel glances down and sees, obviously hesitates, then reluctantly backs away towards the door again. “Dean, we really need to meet with Sam, discuss the case, otherwise…”

Dean nods, gulping in air. “Yeah, no, I get it. Let’s go.”

As they walk towards Sam’s room, Castiel takes his hand. Dean grins.

“I’m still angry at you.”

“Yup. And I still love you.”

Dean’s heart quickens when Castiel smiles that wonderful, gummy smile.


End file.
